Some lady I have never met will tell my fiancé that in 2 months & 4 days. In front of our family and friends, we’ll smooch and be married. I’m having a really hard time getting excited about the whole thing, really. One thing I’ve learned about myself in the 1.5 years we’ve been engaged is that I will never, ever be a wedding planner. I fucking loathe this entire process. I hate the sudden push for traditionalism, constantly being lectured on “what’s appropriate” and being told how/what I should be doing. You know what everyone? Go to hell!
Our wedding day will also be our 4 year anniversary. I planned it that way because I’m OCD and didn’t want two anniversary dates! However, because of the length of time we’ve been together and the fact that we’ve cohabited for 3 of those 4 years (and he basically stepped in as Dad for my kid) makes me feel like we are already married. So all this wedding hoopla is STRAIGHT UP ANNOYING!
My mom and best friend are constantly on my ass about what I need to do or who I need to call and blah fucking blah. I get it, it’s a wedding, I have to make arrangements for it. Quite honestly though, I would have been perfectly happy doing the whole Justice of the Peace thing with a couple of witnesses and after-party at the closest bar…. but my family would have had a fit. Those cute little Italian Catholics LOVE their traditions and shit like that. I can’t wait to see their reactions when there are absolutely ZERO mentions of God, prayers, or any of that religious crap in my ceremony :)
All I want to do is make the favors and decorate. Those are the only things that feel like fun to me. I don’t want to drag my ass around in a big fancy constricting dress (although yes, it is GORGEOUS) being chatted up by people I don’t know, literally. Half of my mother’s family are strangers to me, and those are the folks that will be eating up the overpriced food and binge drinking on the overpriced alcohol. I care about picking out flowers for the floral arrangements. I don’t give a shit what my fiancé and his groomsmen wear, hell I didn’t even care what my bridesmaids wear.
Deciding on the cupcake/cake shit was PAINFUL and creating the different lists of music for the DJ is a task that makes me want to stab myself in the eye with a busted pen. Let’s see… what else?? Oh, photographer – haven’t hired one of those. Invitations – haven’t ordered those. Shoes – I bought but my mother and Matron hate them….. you get the picture? I just don’t feel like doing any of this. Unfortunately since my mother is footing the entire bill, I am obliged to do these things and not bitch about them. Had she not offered to be our financier, Justice of the Peace it would have been!!
It’s not that I don’t want to get married, I just never wanted it to be all this fuss. To me it’s more about the whole signing the marriage certificate and being legally recognized as a couple. For everyone else it’s about… the hoopla (and as my mother and Matron keep saying – “the gifts”). Fuckin’ good riddance man, you can keep it all!
Who knows, maybe my attitude will change when it gets closer? For right now though, this whole thing has been one major pain in the ass. Bring on the wedding day so I can eat cake and drink beer and be done planning!!!!