I guess I should be used to it by now, but I refuse to just “get over it”. I am absolutely sick & tired of people making rude ass remarks to me. Even if they don’t mean any harm and especially when I’ve done nothing to ask for them.
Little J & I just returned from the bank where the little miss opened up her first ever, totally her own savings account. When we walked in and told a banker why we were there, she brought us over to her desk and got started right away. The first question was: “Is this your daughter?” Pretty standard.
After I confirmed that the mini-me I came in with was indeed my spawn, she shook her head and said “You look too young to have a kid.”
I replied with as much sarcasm as I could muster through my rage and said “Well I have her, so I guess I’m not too young after all.”
She shook her head again, smiled and continued working. What. The. Fuck.
If my daughter hadn’t been with me, I would have told her what I really thought of her rude, snide remark. Fucking bitch.
The rest of the situation was smooth and painless but I couldn’t stop thinking about how she felt entitled to say that to me. I will nonchalantly mention that she was a middle-aged Asian woman. I only mention that because I had another instance of rude ass inappropriate remarks at a dentist appointment for little J a couple of years ago. That time, about her race (she is mixed). I also worked for a Filipino woman a couple of years ago who said whatever the fuck crazy mean ass thing came to mind with no filter at all. I didn’t stay with her long, it was borderline verbal abuse. Coincidence? I don’t know.
Another time I had a fellow soccer mom tell me she couldn’t believe I had a kid on the team because she thought I was a teenager.
Am I overly sensitive? Maybe. Having a kid at 19 changed my life dramatically and put me into a category that people feel free to comment on without reserve. I would never walk up to a woman and say “Wow, you look way too old to have a kid in 3rd grade. I thought you were a grandmother.” You get what I’m saying?
Now I know this might sound like the pot calling the kettle black, because I’ve been known to say some pretty rude shit to people. But hey, in those situations it was absolutely solicited by the situation. Or in my mind it was, at least. In general, I try to always be polite and pleasant in public, you never know what someone is going or has been through. Have the decency at least to follow the age-old advice of “If you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all”.
Today’s lesson is: Shut your fucking mouth if you’re going to say something even slightly derogatory.